Wednesday, April 23, 2014

A Day Late and a Dollar Short

As you can tell I'm not a big "earth day" celebrator. Don't get me wrong, I do what I can and try but I'm not tying myself to trees to save them. Unless it might help me lose weight? Hmmm this might be a new strategy I can get behind. Forget it, I would probably eat the bark out of desperation and the bark is just carbs after all and it would go straight to my ass like everything else.

So here is what I do to lessen my "impact" on the Earth. Stop laughing. Okay. Seriously I do it to lessen the impact on my wallet as opposed to the Earth, but it's win/win right, so you can champion my efforts for Earth Day.

I make all my own household cleaners. Yep. Everything. Furniture polish, window/mirror cleaner, tub cleaner, laundry detergent and I even make my own "toilet bombs" to disinfect in between cleanings.  Now call me crazy, but honestly, they clean better. I'm not joking. Because I'm dirt poor in order to keep my hair color from lasting a bit longer than typical hair color I use a color depositing conditioner. Which can make my brand new WHITE tub, pink.  So the last time I was going to clean the pink tub back to it's white luster, I still had some leftover tub/tile cleaner so I figured might as well use it up, it didn't remotely do anything, the pink remained and was not cleaning. I started to panic a little that I waited to long to wash the tub after my hair color refresh and just ruined the tub that I spent a lot of money on to remodel. So took a deep breath and took out my homemade tub cleaner, and instantly the pink was gone.

Can I just tell you too that my house smells so much better since using homemade cleaners. Because I use essential oils that I like, it's a lot nicer walking into the bathroom to a faint smell of orange and lemons as opposed to strong bleachy scents.

I drive a Toyota Corolla. Okay it's not a hybrid, but it's still a Corolla so therefore I'm not really contributing too much trouble to the air. Plus I'm unemployed, so I literally fill up my gas tank once a month right now as I'm home all the time.  I wonder if they will erect a statue to me for Earth Day? I hope they thin it out a little so I'm not so hippy.

I try with the skin and makeup products as well.  Here is one product I'm super excited about.  I rarely wear eye makeup except for mascara. No matter what mascara I buy if I rub my eye which apparently I do often my eye gets very itchy, red and burning. I've tried every mascara under the sun and unfortunately they all do the same thing. Iritate the one part of my body they are suppose to be safe for. Go figure. So I read a review of Josie Maran's mascara, that it worked well for volumizing but was also all fancy schmanzy with the no parabens and all that jazz. So I bought some on Amazon, actually a travel size because if it didn't work I didn't want to plunk down that kind of cashola.  But can I just tell you I AM IN LOVE. Not only does it make my lashes look long and luscious, if I rub my eye, NO IRRITATION.

And it boasts on her website that it is formulated without Parabens, Sulfates, Synthetic fragrances, Synthetic Dyes, Phthalates, GMOs and Triclosan. I don't know what any of that shit is but I'm sure it's really bad for the environment and your body in some way.

I feel like the skin/makeup world of better safety standards and least chemically laden is dodgy, it's very hit or miss. I usually consult the website Skin Deep created by the Environmental Working Group to help you sift through the shit out there. Much like "Natural/Organic" labeling on our foods it's equally as misleading.  I looked up her mascara on Skin Deep but unfortunately the only one listed was an old 2010 formula, which got a good rating, it was in the low range, but that doesn't mean this formula is, but honestly I don't care it's not hurting my eyes which is the first of any mascara ever.

I have had hits and misses. I purchased Primal Pit Paste an all natural deodorant and I purchased the unscented version as some of the complaints on the scented versions turned me off, but I literally had my mom sniff my armpit because I couldn't tell if it worked, clearly it works, but because I bought the unscented I was feeling like maybe it wasn't. Stupid me.

I just recently purchased Herbal Choice Mari in Sweet Orange and Cranberry shampoo which again was on the Skin Deep website showing up on the low range of bad stuff and I am not even sure if it works well to clean my hair, I haven't paid attention but the smell in my shower is AMAZING. It could be made with monkey poo and I wouldn't care. It smells fantastic.

So I'm trying, I'm not perfect and I'm not wearing hemp clothing but I do my best. What do you do to help?

Thursday, April 17, 2014

Attack of the Trees

New England spring is almost here..Monday it was 80 degrees, Tuesday it was pouring rain and Wednesday it snowed. HA! Love it!

But with it has brought some nasty pollen and waking up in the morning stuffed up with a giant headache reminds me I need to find my Claritin. But I am excited that we are finally getting some sunny weather and nice days where the windows can be opened and the stale stuffiness of winter air can be let out.

Can we also talk about inflation for a moment? Groceries are out of control. I just bought basics for a pie I'm going to make for Easter. I didn't buy any sugar or flour since I already have that at home, so just some fruit and a couple other things as well as one carton of eggs to make deviled eggs. $31.50 later...I shit you not. for one pie. Holy crap. I cannot believe how expensive everything is at the grocery store, never mind the gas pump, heating oil/gas, and electricity and oh yay! escrow account is low again this year so I have to pump more money into that. But good god the groceries. Wow.

Anyone else feeling the pinch at the grocery store? Or is it just because I'm unemployed right now and so I am noticing it that much more?

The weight loss is slow moving, but I'm trying every day, I'll hit a stride eventually right? I actually did a little review of a new fancy scale on the market for Cranky Fitness and there is a giveaway so hop over there when you get a chance to check it out.

So Easter is on Sunday, if you celebrate do you choose to bring healthier versions of traditional favorites or do you forgo the stringent diet for one day? If you do lighten things up, what do you do to make them a little less calorie laden but still delicious.

If you celebrate Easter. Happy Easter.  

Kaló Páscha for all my Greeks!

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

I'm a Chick....We cannot say NO to a sale!

So thanks to my fitness/weight loss Guru-Norma she has put my anxiety about macros at ease and basically told me not to sweat it as much as I was. Thanks Norma. I look back on my MFP diaries when I was deep into Leangains and realize, I wasn't really paying much attention to my macros and dropping mad pounds. So I'm going to try not to worry about it too much and focus more on getting myself into a routine so when I get a job I don't get out of it.

So lets take a little detour today. Are you a typical woman and can't say no to a really good sale?? This is me. Over the winter The Frugal Girls Blog had a ton of sales on baby stuff. Baby Sling, Baby Car Seat Cover, Baby Nursing Pillow, Baby Nursing Cover up, Belly Bands for when you are pregnant. They were all free except shipping and handling. So you would wonder is Starving Bitch having a baby?

That would be a negative. Does Starving Bitch want a baby. Absolutely. Does Starving Bitch have a job to pay for said baby. No. Does Starving Bitch have a boyfriend to provide necessary ingredients to make baby. No. But did Starving Bitch buy all this baby shit?? ABSOLUTELY.

I figure someone, somewhere, soon is going to have a baby and I'm going to have to give a baby gift to said new mommy. So why not, would I like to use for myself?? Sure. But what the hell.

Am I the only one that shops like this? Sometimes I think are you stupid? LOL but what a deal. Why would I pass it up.

Now I'm not one of those extreme coupon hoarder chicks that buy 800 packages of toothpaste that will expire before I ever get to use any of them, or 250 blocks of chocolate shake mix because it was on sale and the more you buy with coupons the more you get free. A) Starving Bitch doesn't have a basement and B) Starving Bitch gets sick of clutter and has to do a major purging so she could never be a hoarder.

I'm having trouble stepping out of my comfort zone, the last week we have had two video challenges in my Beachbody challenge group and so far I have not done them. Today's I recorded myself probably a minimum of 5 times and each time I found something negative about the video and deleted it. I really need to step out of my comfort zone and put it up on the facebook group. But I am paralyzed with fear.

What is something that makes you very uncomfortable??? Eating alone in a restaurant? Family get-to-gethers? Working out in public? Please tell me I'm not the only one with these types of phobias.

Sunday, March 30, 2014

But...But...I am sooo tired

I'm starting to worry about myself a bit. All I want to do is sleep. Yesterday I got up around 10 am and then went back down around 3 to take a nap. Who at 40 needs a nap when they have no job??? Seriously.

To try and curb my "I have nothing to do but sleep" I'm going to start setting my alarm and getting up and working out as if I have a job to go too. Figured it can't hurt and might curb this nap taking.

This week went pretty good, worked out all week to Slim in 6. My eating wasn't stellar, it was hard to get into a groove with my macros. I am not getting enough protein and I can't seem to cut the carbs enough, it's a very tough balance.  I've been trying to find what macros are good for me, since I have PCOS carbs aren't really my friend so I want to be low carb but it's just been so difficult to keep the balance, everything has carbs even things you don't think.

I know my friend Norma out there is really good with the macros. Maybe she can get me in the right groove to eating in my proper macros. Everything I read was so different, I was just overwhelmed.

So on the agenda for this week is to keep up my workouts but set my alarm and get up early to do them, so I can stop the afternoon napping and to clean up my eating and keep within my macros.

I'm also getting back on the Leangains (Intermittent Fasting) bandwagon because I know how well it works for me. If you haven't read about it, check it out here  I want to get back to that body I had a year and a half ago.  The determination, the drive, everything.

What macro combo works for you? What exercise programs are you using right now to keep fit?

Friday, March 28, 2014

Homemade Chips!

Want a quick recipe to make your own healthier "chips"...Grab some Joseph's Lavash Bread with Flax. Cut them up into strips. Spray lightly with some olive oil spray just to make them a bit damp and sprinkle with salt and pepper (that's the flavor I like the best) but really you can sprinkle them with whatever you want.  I have done red pepper, Parmesan cheese as well as cinnamon to make something sweet.

 Bake in a 350 oven for about 8-10 mins, you have to watch them because they will burn if you have them in long, and you will have to lessen the time as the stove heats up, you want them a nice golden brown.

 Check out the Nutritional page. You can easily count out how many chips you get out of 1 full Lavash. So that way if you are tracking your calories you know how many calories for a total amount of chips. Not bad for some really great chips low in fat and a good amount of dietary fiber. Typically I make them in bulk especially in the summer when you're outside and eating hummus and dips.

Thursday, March 27, 2014

StarvingDiva has a Facebook Account!

So it's only taken several years and back and forth thoughts on whether or not I would have enough visitors to warrant making a facebook page, but here I am pimping myself out.

Starving Diva has been socially savvy on Twitter for a while StarvingDiva

So come find Striving for Skinny Jeans on Facebook too because afterall who doesn't want to read about failures/successes of a Starving Bitch.

A Dog Chasing It's Tail

Photo from

I am in a complete crossroads in my life right now and feel like I'm in a complete mindfuck with myself. I know? A mindfuck with yourself. Yep that's all I can think to call it.

Yesterday I laid in bed until noon. I woke up around 9 and just laid there with the two cats until noon. I had no other reason to get out of bed. I didn't care.

The job thing is really bothering me. I absolutely positively do not want to go back to being an administrative assistant. I really enjoyed being a recruiter but I wasn't in it long enough to have enough experience for someone to hire me as a recruiter. So I think I'm partially depressed about the fact that despite not wanting to be an Administrative Assistant again, I'm going to have to be. The other part of it is that in this part of the country money isn't there for Administrative Assistants. While they certainly want my 20 years of experience, they want to pay me what I was making about 20 years ago. Not what my experience and knowledge now demands for pay. I get the supply and demand world and right now unfortunately the employer has the upper hand. But I need to live. So the thought of having to take two jobs is equally depressing. I'm 40 years old, I can do it, but I don't want too.

That's just the truth, I don't fucken want too. I've worked so hard all my life and I don't want to have to go to another job after working a full-time job during the day. Not whining, just reality.

Administrative Assistants are a dime a dozen right now, so just being able to get a call back or an interview is proving challenging. As much as well meaning friends calling or emailing and saying to me "With all your experience I can't believe you haven't found a job yet" I really want to say FUCK YOU! you know without the repercussions of telling your friend to fuck off. I know I have 20 years experience and you'd think employers would be calling me but the truth of the matter is the way resumes are done nowadays, everything is online and the sheer volume these HR departments are getting, I'm not even sure 1/2 the time my resume is being seen.

I'm completely out of all my 401k money, as soon as that runs out, I won't be able to pay any of my bills except for my mortgage and condo fee.

I seriously had a complete meltdown this morning just trying to decide what am I going to have to do? Am I going to have to move in with my parents and rent out my house to someone?

I seriously want to curl up and not peek my head out until it's all over. I just want someone else to take care of me for a change. I get that it's impossible since I'm not married and have nobody else to rely on but myself. Well that just plain sucks I'm not going to lie.

Could I win Publishers Clearing House please???? No? Well Fuck.

I can't even get into my personal life on here, but suffice it to say. That isn't much better.

I have no direction, I feel like I'm a dog chasing it's tail.